Look out Napa!!

A few months back,I opined about the goings-on in South Florida. I guess I had hoped it to be joke. Apparently not.

County clears way for winery in South Dade

Some of the gems from the article:

"Schnebly Redland's Winery expects to sell its first bottle of locally pressed wine, made from tropical fruit on its 96-acre farm in South Dade, by Feb. 14, said its owner."

February 14, huh? Good luck cashing in on the Valentine's Day thing. I reckon nothing says 'I love you' like a bottle of Guava wine. If the F.A. gave me a bottle of this stuff, I would immediately start apologizing for whatever it was that I had done. Either that, or we would have to sit down and have a serious talk.

"Most people do not think of vineyards and wineries when they think of Florida, (but the state) has a $5 million viticulture industry," said Jennifer Parsons, public-affairs director for the Dade County Farm Bureau, based in Homestead."

I can't imagine why Florida and Wine Country aren't synonymous in the mind of the average consumer. Ms. Parsons sure gives it the old college try on the "$5 million viticulture industry' bit, and while 5 mill may be better than a kick in the ass, this is about as much money as Disney World pulls in selling Cokes and Corn Dogs in a weekend.

"We don't have a single grape wine here," Mr. Schnebly said."

Um, Houston....we have a problem.

"It's an idea borrowed from California's Napa Valley, where farmers have merged tourism and agriculture to attract 5 million visitors each year to wineries and vineyards.
"If we got just a portion of the tourist interest that they have there, certainly you can see the potential we'd have here," Mr. Moss said.

To quote Nathan Arizona, 'Yeah, and if a frog had wings, it wouldn't bump its ass a-hoppin'.

"One month before it is scheduled to open - and before it has received its license to sell liquor - Schnebly Redland's Winery has booked its first tour group, Napa Valley's Wine and Food Institute."

Hence the warning for my friends out west. I know this sounds innocent enough - Pack up a gang of food/wine loving people, throw 'em on jet plane and spend a few days hanging out with you toes in the sand. I suspect Old man Schnebly might be up to something a little more sinister. All I have to say is 'Don't drink the passion fruit wine! Maybe my imagination is getting the best of me but this has all the makings of Robert Mondavi meets Jim Jones, and the next thing you know there will be hundreds of wierdos walking around in black Nikes, the jingle of quarters in their pockets just in case, yammering on about the joys of fruit wine. 'Try the passion fruit...you will see'.

" By summer, the winery is expected to create about 30 jobs in packing, retail and other areas. At full capacity, it is projected to produce about 114,680 cases of wine and generate about $13.8 million in sales annually."

I suppose if you're going to shoot, shoot big, right? At the risk of sounding anymore like the 'Doubting Thomas' of the good book, is it anywhere close to realistic to expect that this one project will effectively quadruple the viticulture industry in Florida?

In the words of Old Tommy-Boy --- 'I doubt it'.