Genius of the week nominee

So it's been a while since someone stepped up to the plate and swung for the fences. This guy may have knocked one out:

When Hang Time Hangs You Up

From the looks of it, Mr. Morgan is a regular contributor to the venerable monthly tome that is The Wine Entusiast. If this is the best they've got, you may want to take your five bucks and throw it out the window. You'll get better insight. Or maybe the Enthusiast ought to give me a call.

Straight-away, there is this comment:

"The Controversy over ripeness levels in california winegrapes bothers some growers, critics and enologists - but delights fans of lush, fruit-forward wines."

So who is one to believe? I mean, its obvious that the growers, critics, and enologists have a severe bias, right? So they are not to be trusted. And beware the fool who questions the almighty consumer. As I have stated before, most people don't know jack about wine or anything else for that matter. Well, maybe pop culture, but precious little more than that. There seem to be real concerns about the effects of longer hangtime on the health of the vine, the subsequent wines produced from said grapes, and yes, the monetary effect of such practices on growers. I have little patience for this kind of 'devil-may-care' attitude that permeates this entire article. Mr. Morgan's response:

"This, of course, is pretty much nonsense. Twenty years ago, the average price per ton of California red wine grapes was barely $175. At that time, if someone had told grower and seminar organizer Andy Beckstoffer he would be paid the $6,000-plus per ton he now gets for his choicest Cabernet Sauvignon, he wouldn’t have believed it."

And so I must ask you, Mr Morgon, if twenty years ago someone told you that you'd be paying $2.50 for a gallon of regular gasoline, would you have believed them? In 1982, Conan the Barbarian came out. Could you have possibly imagined this guy would be elected Governor of California? I doubt it. And speaking of twenty years ago, weren't they still 'giving' land away out there? You can't buy a wide spot in the road now for less than $500k/acre!

"Today, all the best growers get top dollar for their grapes, even though they might lose a little tonnage to the shrivel factor. But that shrivel factor is the key to the current style of winemaking so popular among consumers and winemakers: Ultraripe grapes produce the lush, supple wines that have become the hallmark of Napa Valley Cabernet. Some say these wines are too alcoholic—the fermentation result of grapes that contain too much sugar." (Emphasis T.t.S.)

Is there a finer example of the tail wagging the dog? Of course there are exceptions, but if you drink most of these wines, it becomes very obvious that these wines were 'made' to cater to the 'current style'. This is incredibly short-sighted and ultimately silly. And just in case you forgot, this wasn't always the case in California. I have been fortunate to have had some older Cabs from California (mid-late 70's) and the wines are holding up quite well. I'm sure this has nothing to do with the grapes being harvested before Halloween and finished wines with alcohol levels in the 12-13 percent range. Only coincidence, right?

"The one wine the attending sommeliers fought over after the tasting was Harlan Estate."

To use Harlan as some sort of indication of the rest of California Cabernet is simply an exercise in journalistic masturbation. Kudos for getting into the Parker tasting, the rest of the world has no clue what you're talking about.

"It makes sense to me. Taste Cabernet grown in a cooler climate such as New York or Chinon, in France’s Loire Valley. These wines can be tasty, but they are marked by herbal notes that would be inappropriate to Napa Valley."

This one is unbelievable. First off, the Cabernet that is at home in Chinon is of the clan 'Franc' not 'Sauvignon'. I trust you know this and it was simply your editor that let this one slip by. Secondly, I have found far more 'herbal notes' in New World Cab Franc than I have ever found in any Chinon. This is likely due to poor growing and vinification i.e. a winemaker treating Cab Franc like Cab Suav. This is not all the far removed from most California attempts at Viognier. Newsbreak: It isn't Chardonnay. Don't treat it as such. And lastly, how is it that those 'herbal notes would be inappropriate to Napa Valley'? Honestly, I don't even know what that means.

" Aside from Smart’s occasional acerbic barbs (“Winemakers are not people. Yeast are winemakers.”),..."

Technically, he is 100% correct. I know egos throughout the world are being crushed but..

"Frankly, I’m so tired of that debate. Ultimately, proof of quality is in the bottle. If a wine tastes great, who cares what the alcohol level is?"

You're right, the proof is in the bottle. The down side is that by the time you reach the end of the bottle, you may have a bit of trouble remembering how it started.

I knew there was a reason I stopped reading this magazine. Thanks for the reminder.